Fall Festival Weekend

So this past weekend I went to the Fall Festival in RI with Lou. It was perfect weather but the whole weekend was off to a rough start~

When I got off work Friday night, I had been dropped off so Billy could use my car for whatever he was doing. So I was dropped off and the original plan was for Louis to pick me up but I hadn't packed for the weekend. I was picked up and driven directly to a bar where both my parents and my uncle met up. I began getting agitated because my mother said we'd go home within 5ish minutes and I was supposed to meet Lou for 9pm. 30 minutes go by and I tell Lou to be patient but I hear my father say to my mom, who is obviously bummed that I'm beginning to freak out "Don't worry, don't be sad honey, her plans don't matter." And immediately I text Lou to come straight to the bar. Upon finding out he's coming, my father immediately tries to get everyone to leave the bar and leave me stranded. I was so angry I got really upset at the bar and had to leave so people didn't see how flushed I was. I was taken home and had to call Lou AGAIN to meet me at home.

When he got there I ran up to him, then packed really fast and jumped in his car. I couldn't get away fast enough.

He was really sweet despite how angry and short tempered I was and how pouty and bratty I was with him. He bought my a pumpkin latte, something we always share together now and my mood improved because I know he was trying to cheer me up.

The weekend got a lot better after that.

fucking mushy as fuq;; you've been warned

Ugh

I had a really terrible day today. I got in a bit of an argument with Louis regarding the fact that I don't text him as much as he does and I'm relatively withdrawn when we are apart.

I also was extremely late to work because of a schedule mix up, had my clothes torn on a box cutter and had my coworkers be less than supportive.

And I get home and the only thing I want to do is clean and currently I'm going crazy on my house because it's such a mess but the amount of pent up irritation has converted into an unlimited supply of energy.

I talked to my friend about it and she mentioned (because she's obsessed with SNK) that if Levi and Eren had a love child it would be me due to the amount of OCD rage. Currently it applies to today. But I already feel better now that I'm being productive 

Health Update and Hang out

Nexplanon - One Week Later

Healed up great! just a lil red dot and some redness where I removed the bandages.

Healing update 3-4 days later

Healing - approx 90 hours (4ish) days later.

Bandages came off and only the underbandages keeping the crater incision (puncture wound) remain. They're super sticky and the doctor said to keep them on until they fall off naturally around day 10. The dark line is the marker and slightly bruising from the implant.

symptoms and experiences so far:

Mood levels are fine but on a whole I've felt anxious because of personal family stuff and having Louis angry at someone Saturday was terrifying. I wasn't even present but i spoke with him through it and it was intense in my opinion. Hard to say if hormones are adding to it or not.

Very crampy lately. Just finished monthly lady business but progesterone is the chemical that tricks your body into thinking its pregnant, so the symptoms come along with it initially according to the doctor.

My back and lower abdomen were in excruciating pain in the mornings but tamed with little heating pads. Nausea comes and goes in waves. It's miserable physically but slowly improving. After reading a lot of reviews I'm just happy that everyone else seemed to have similar experiences.

Acne is ok. Instead of entirely clear skin I get a few very very small blemishes but not bad as long as I just keep my face clean. No weight gain, more cravings for meat, eggs and chocolate. Less cravings for seafood and dairy.

Overall I notice the hormones because of these changes but I'm hoping after the week is over they should be subsiding.

I Skyped for a long time tonight without issue so symptoms are beginning to space themselves out. At work I only felt gross twice. 

That's it so far!!!  I can push through this no problem. Totally worth the 3 years.

Uncommon problems

For those of you, (i.e. all of you), who don't know, I used to live in a very large house. It had a pool and a play room and a cool basement, but in my Junior year of high school, it imploded while we were away on vacation.

Breakfast, acnl and nexplanon symptom update

Had breakfast at ihop today yay!!

Cape Retreat Day w/ Mom

Quick entry because I'm on mobile:

I went to the beach today with my mother and had a very relaxing afternoon. I love spending time with my mom even though she can drive me crazy. It was really windy and a bit chilly so we ended up leaving after 1-2 hours. The rest of the day was spent napping and being lazy until dinner when we went out together. It was really refreshing. 

We also stopped for ice cream. I was happy that I got to talk to her about a lot of things that made me nervous and personal biz. It was only recently that I opened up to her about sex life stuff and relationships and other personal issues and it seemed like a weight off my shoulders.

I hope we have more days like this. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I return tomorrow to FINALLY get the fucking implant in my arm ugh. They've been putting it off so long I want to die but they're taking my money tomorrow so they better get it done lol

BUT I'M FEELING TWENTY THREE

Finally a post about the best weekend ever.

I think sometimes my sense of character is too independent for its own good.

何も

打ち明けられない誰も
信じられない誰も彼も
人生は難しい
今日、何がいないだよ

眠いですよ、とても眠い。

飲みたい、眠たい。

寂しい、とても寂しい

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