TOMORROW IS THE DAY I MEET UP WITH HIROKI, LITERALLY MY BEST FRIEND AND THE MAN I'M PLATONICALLY IN LOVE WITH AND MY BACK UP HUSBAND IF NEITHER OF US ARE MARRIED BY 26.
Hiroki was a college transfer student at my university during my Sophomore year and following a lot of shit, he became my closest friend. For a while we had crushes on each other because we were SO close (despite him not physically being my type) but it faded into mutual respect and now we're both in committed relationships but still joke around like a married couple. I'll be staying with him for three days and we're going to adventure all over the city. I'm so excited.
The subject of joint tattoos came up too but I don't know if I'm entirely ready. I always plan these things out a million years in advance and I kind of wanted my first tattoo to be the one I had planned for a while but this kid means the world to me so I might go through with it if its a reasonable cost. Definitely getting more piercings if I don;t though! No body ones, probably just ears still. Trying to fill them up before moving elsewhere.
Honestly not even sure if I want my belly or collarbones pierced anymore. Kind of getting over that whole scene and I'm really lazy during the healing process when it comes to rings and stuff and they're easy to pull out whereas with tattoos, you can't exactly rip one out accidentally LOL.
Anyway, yes, it's going to be great, and whats better is that it will be giving me a chance to brush up on my Japanese AND Korean considering that's the only language that will be spoken between me and Hiroki and the others I'll be meeting up with. No English for the next three days is intimidating though.
~~~~~WARNING: GROSS LOVEY STUFF AFTER THE "READ MORE": AVERT EYES~~~~~~~~~
Gonna make a cut for some of my Louis posts because it can be too mushy but I need to write it out. For daily hangout, there won't be cuts all the time. In this case, it's a bunch of feels because of the date. Just for my HS buds or tumblr followers who read this and don't wanna see all the love crap LOL
As of midnight, and I mean exactly midnight ~ it will have been three months since me and Louis were a thing. I'm sad I won't be around. I'm debating visiting him like he asked when he returns from CT but it'll be around 1 or 2 I think. Whenever I say three months it kind of shocks me because it seems like it's already been a year or two with the way we speak to each other and the way he plans out his life, always including me and taking serious turns with conversation about the future. I always say "if we're still together" or "if we don't hate each other by next year" or something but he always says "when we have our apartment, let's..." and "grandma said our babies are gonna be hot as fuck" or when I say things like "when I get married, I'm gonna travel _______ with my husband" and he makes comments like "I look forward to it" or "you mean when you're married to me right?" and even though I know he's not being serious, there's a charm that goes with it that makes me feel really good. He makes me feel like he's in it for the long haul and even though I was almost married once before, I never got this feeling of total security around my ex fiancee.
I don't know if Louis really looks at my blog anymore because I asked him not to. I want to be able to write freely without him getting offended by anything or seeing any posts about exes etc.
But if he does, or even if he doesn't - I want to thank him for being there. Especially in recent months, I'm so happy to see him smile again and have fun and be with his friends and be around me. I'm proud of him for being ambitious and cooking. I love when he talks about his passions and how he gets excited when he looks at clothes for fall (no homo) and when he told me he was officially growing out his hair, how he included his sister and made a huge deal about it. I'm happy to see him more confident in the way he looks and how he always sends me a post workout picture when he goes running and does his push ups (you're skinny, I promise).
Louis, I'm so happy and lucky to have you. You treat me well. You say kind things to me. Sometimes you buy me dinner even though I know you shouldn't and should save money. You always make me dumplings when I ask and feed me when I'm hungry (which is always) and you're cooking is incredible. You always care about my well being and whether or not I am happy or I feel good first and foremost. You put up with my jokes, and even better, you always make me tell them to you so I laugh myself into a fit and you pinch my cheeks and tell me that makes you happiest is when I'm laughing. You support me and my future and you never let me leave without a kiss. You even watch horror movies with me and go places with me. If I want to go to an aquarium, you do, if I want to go to a zoo, we plan it and if I want to go out to a party or a bar and be social, you'll always dress up and accompany me and make sure I'm having a good time. You even started hunting for couple cosplays, and probably are a lot more into it than I am at this point LOL. I'm happy you look at me the way you do. I'm happy that when we have truly intimate moments you always are the one to say the phrase "made love" first because I think it's too cheesy and girlish and am always embarrassed to say it. I'm happy you touch me like I'm a prized possession that's fragile. I'm happy you kiss my neck because you know I'm ticklish and like to be a jerk sometimes. I'm happy you wrap your arms around me even when I want to be left alone. I love when you tell me my body is the most beautiful thing you've ever laid eyes on and you run your hands over it and kiss it and treat it like it's the greatest thing you've ever seen. I love it when you tell me I'm too hot for you even though in reality you're too hot for me. I'm happiest when I'm with you and around you, even if we're doing nothing. I'm happy to feel unjudged for my past and no matter how weird or creepy I am, and I'm happy you support everything I do. I'm happy you try new things with me and whenever we get mad it's literally for 10 minutes or less before we both cave and go back to being sweet.
Thank you for making me feel loved again and thank you for being in my life. I know I don't say it often enough but I love you. I love you for the person you are and even if we don't last or even if we do, I will love you for being yourself and being the great man that you are and I wish you nothing but happiness and success and prosperity (which I will hopefully be around to share joy with you in). I hope you are happy with me too. It's only been three months so far, but you know it's felt like a lifetime. Here's to a lot more lifetimes.
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